Smack Back

One of those things you see and you can't believe your eyes: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V_cdBCzLvi4

Felix Hernandez hit a grand slam off the Mets' Johan Santana today. Felix is the first AL pitcher to hit a grand slam in 37 years. Steve Dunning of the Indians was the last one to do it before him: May 11th, 1971. The DH was implemented in 1972.

Heres the full story- http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/news/story?id=3452684

For those of you too lazy to read it heres the scoop:
Greg Anderson is Barry Bond's personal trainer, who was held in prison for contempt for 13 and a half months. Now that he has been released his wife is the target of a grand jury investigation.

Clearly, the government is using whatever means they can to get Bonds in jail. Although their means are not ethically correct (sending a man to prison for contempt for over a year!) I believe they are doing the right thing. Anderson deserves what he is going through because it is clear that he sold steroids to Bonds; if Anderson had not done such a thing he would have complied with the government months ago.

Hopefully Anderson will give in and Bonds will get what he deserves (two years in prison). Thats what happens when you do steroids.

"Sources" for the New York Times say that Clemens and many others are/were participating in the practice of using Viagra to enhance their training and athletic performance.

There's no punch line here, they're serious.

Well, that is it from Chavez Ravine. Cubs go down with a wimper looking shell shocked from seeing their ace rocked for 5 in the 7th (and 13 hits). All in all a great day of baseball...except for the outcome...Dodgers 7, Cubs 3.

3rd inning, the Cubs season flashes before my eyes as Juan Pierre plows into Derek Lee at first. This happened a couple of years ago…when the Cubs were also playing well, and Lee was out for a while…and there went the season. It might have even happened at Dodger Stadium. Thankfully Pierre is 120 pounds soaking wet.

Either follows with a hit to continue the rally…but thankfully porn-stache owner Jeff Kent raps into a double play as the crowd erupts (yes, this is Dodger stadium, but half the people here have to be Cub fans).

Lowe is spinning a no-hitter through 4 (jinx intended). I don’t have the numbers to back this up in front of me…but Lowe has always seemed to give the Cubs a hard time.

Only five men in Major League Baseball history have hit 600 home runs – the aforementioned three, plus Barry Bonds (762) and Sammy Sosa (609). So, why weren’t the dates of their 600th home runs included in MLB’s tribute to Griffey’s pursuit? I guess it’s possible that mentioning all five players would take too long for a quick, effective commercial. And I guess it’s possible that Barry Bonds will make the Hall of Fame someday. What’s more likely, however, is that Major League Baseball is whitewashing history.

I think on of the players at RotoHog needs to step in the ring and battle Jose.

Discussed much less was Hansen’s ordeal with sleep apnea, which apparently caused him to snore, toss and turn, and look perpetually stoned. According to reports, that condition has now been rectified, although Hansen still looks like someone who’d bogart the spleef (like he did as Pickford in “Dazed and Confused”).

Baseball bloopers serve to remind me that Julio Lugo isn’t the only fielder who bobs around like a wounded wildebeest. So, try to enjoy the following compilation. My favorite comes early, when the Royals’ first baseman buries the relay throw into the pitcher’s face. Even Lugo hasn’t done that.

Well, not yet anyway.